Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama (1988)
Review by Theron Neel
As long as there have been movies, there have been B movies. Traditionally low-budget, barely publicized affairs, B movies are usually genre films (sci-fi, western, horror, etc.), featuring actors of little or no repute, often made by small specialty studios and cranked out as if on an assembly line. Although lesser features, early B movies were popular, profitable, and produced their own separate group of stars, different than the major actors of the day.
In the 1930’s, though horror existed, the predominant B movie genre was the Western. In the ‘40s, gangster movies and films noir became popular. In the ’50s, with the rise of rock ‘n’ roll, the cold war, and the teenager as a social force, B movies exploded into a diverse range of areas: rock ‘n’ roll roadshows, juvenile delinquent and hot rod dramas, sci-fi/horror pastiches with Red Scare overtones, and foreign films dubbed into English (e.g., the Japanese Godzilla, the Italian Hercules).
The ‘60s B movies saw the rise of the Hammer Films from Britain, the “beach movies” with Frankie and Annette and company, the Elvis movies (which, although they starred the most famous singer in the world, were decidedly low quality productions), Russ Meyer’s nudie cuties, and the first gore flicks, courtesy of Herschell Gordon Lewis. Also, the radical social changes of the ‘60s were reflected in the B films of the day way before they made it to the “legitimate” films. Of course, the most famous of these would be Easy Rider.
Although the seeds of exploitation were planted in the ‘60s, they definitely came to fruition in the ‘70s grindhouse scene. By this time, pretty much anything taboo was fair game: blaxploitation, sexploitation, naked women in prison flicks, and, perhaps most influential, hardcore horror – mainly, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre and Halloween.
All of this brings us to the ‘80s, the decade in which the low budget horror film came into its own. The success of the cheaply made Texas Chain Saw Massacre and Halloween in the ‘70s bred the Friday the 13th series, The Evil Dead movies, et al., and a veritable ‘80s horror explosion ensued. This produced an interesting phenomenon: movies that historically had been made without any thought, and were not expected to make much money, became a dominant box office force. So, what happens when B movies become “A movies” ― especially when these B movies didn’t have to improve in quality to become successful? You get a new level of B movie.
And, yes, this is where we finally get to Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama. Filmed in 1987 and released in January 1988, Sorority Babes is the epitome of this lower level of ‘80s B movies. It features everything necessary for a terrible ‘80s flick: bad effects, cheesy music, awful acting, horrendous costumes and hairstyles, and perhaps most important, several gratuitous scenes of female nudity.
Another thing Sorority Babes has going for it is three of the era’s most renowned scream queens. You know ‘em, you love ‘em, you can’t watch a low-budget movie without ‘em: Linnea Quigley, Brinke Stevens, and Michelle Bauer (billed here as Michelle McClellen).
So here’s the plot (as if it matters): A sorority is holding initiation rituals that involve paddling the bare bottoms of initiates Brinke Stevens and Michelle Bauer, smearing their naked bodies with whipped cream, and ensuring the girls take an extra long time showering themselves off. Spying on this collegiate fun is three nerdy dudes who just want to see some naked girls. Well, they get what they want, but they’re caught by Babs (Robin Stille), the evil head of the sorority. As punishment, the guys must accompany the sorority babes on the second phase of the initiation: breaking into a bowling alley after hours and stealing a trophy.
Once inside the bowling alley, they discover Spider (played by the wonderful Linnea Quigley, who earns the MVP award here – even without getting naked), who is already ripping off the joint. Spider is all blonde hair and bad attitude, but for the sake of the plot, she joins forces with the others to steal the trophy. But, wouldn’t you know it, the trophy happens to contain an evil imp who talks as if he’s an extra from Coffy or Foxy Brown. Anyway, once released from the trophy, Old Uncle Impy (as he calls himself…seriously) promises to grant everyone a wish…and he does…and you know how this turns out. Each wish goes bad, and before long, people are dying, turning into demons, and heads are being used as bowling balls. It all comes to an end when Spider, the bad girl gone good, and Calvin, the nerd who steals her dark little heart, manage to stuff the imp back into the trophy. And that’s pretty much it.
Now, I could peer deeper into this cheesy bit of ‘80s movie making. I could throw together some theory about how it took the nice guy and the bad girl (i.e., good and evil) to restore order in the universe—about how one can’t exist without the other, yin/yang, blah, blah, blah. But that’d be too much. Sometimes, you just have to enjoy the bad effects, worse dialogue and glorious naked bodies for themselves. Sure, it’s a bad movie. What did you expect from a flick with the title Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama? But sometimes, watching films is not about the destination. Enjoy the journey, people…especially with cheesy ‘80s horror (and a naked Michelle Bauer). That’s what it’s all about.
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