Lesbian Vampire Killers (2009)
Review by Michael Varrati
Perhaps the one great injustice to be found in the wake of Edgar Wright’s groundbreaking zombie comedy Shaun of the Dead is that quite a few films have to live in its shadow. Of course, this is applicable to any zombie-oriented comedy that has come out since, and likely some of those comparisons are justified, but the shadow I am referring to has less to do with the walking dead and more to do with the very American need for categorization.
Seemingly, any horror film with a comedic twist that has been made in the United Kingdom in the last few years invariably has at least one yahoo serving up a Shaun of the Dead comparison, which suggests that we as a people need merely know that it’s British and kind of funny, and thusly, by sheer logic, it must be akin to Shaun.
After all, British people can’t possibly be multi-faceted in their approach to anything, especially since their school of drama gave us the remarkably similar William Shakespeare and Monty Python.
If you haven’t detected the level of sarcasm thus far, I’ll make it plain: It’s relatively insulting to hold an entire culture’s artwork to a single film as a total litmus test, which seemingly has been happening to British imports as of late. Slasher comedy Severance, has a blurb that compares it to Shaun of the Dead right on the DVD case, and the film in question today, Lesbian Vampire Killers, has been heavily (and negatively) reviewed by many in the states as not living up to what was achieved by Shaun of the Dead. The problem with this, however, is that Lesbian Vampire Killers, with the exception of being a British horror-comedy, really doesn’t have much in common with Edgar Wright’s film, and by comparing the two, it doesn’t really give Lesbian Vampire Killers a fair shake. It’s like comparing the work of Woody Allen and the Farrelly Brothers merely because both work in comedy and are American. Yet, any film student worth his/her salt knows that these two work with a totally different palette of skills.
Such is Lesbian Vampire Killers, a slick little flick that probably owes more to Abbott & Costello’s monster romps than any beastie Simon Pegg has ever fought on-screen.
The film tells the story of hapless everyman, Jimmy (Mathew Horne – The Catherine Tate Show) and his overly horny best mate, Fletch (James Corden – The History Boys, Horne & Corden), who decide to split from the travails of London life for the weekend following Jimmy’s particularly devastating break-up with his girlfriend.
The two lads ultimately arrive in the rustic country town of Cragwich, which looks a little something like a village Christopher Lee might haunt in a Hammer film, and contains the secret of a terrible curse. It seems, unbeknownst to our heroes, that the town was once the stomping grounds of the mighty vampire queen, Carmilla (a nice nod to Le Fanu’s famous vampire of the same name), who laid a heinous hex upon the village before being slain by a nobleman (who coincidentally, happens to be Jimmy’s ancestor) which doomed all children of the female gender to transform into the blood-thirsty dead on the eve of their eighteenth birthday. What’s more is that the daughters of Cragwich don’t just become vampires, they become full-fledged, lady-lovin’ lesbian vampires.
Holy Sapphic Satanism!
It isn’t long before Jimmy and Fletch find themselves trapped in a cabin in the woods (as horror movie heroes so often are) with a group of intrepid female grad students (see: the non-lesbian love-interests of the film), and surrounded by legions of lesbian undead who are out for blood.
Can the boys survive the night?
Will their new potential girlfriends soon want girlfriends of their own?
…and what of Jimmy’s ancestral links to the vampires who stalk them?
All of these questions and more are answered in Lesbian Vampire Killers!!
…so, perhaps I got a little silly during the synopsis, but let’s face it…this is one of those movies where silliness is the order of the day. Lesbian Vampire Killers knows from its on-set that it is not a subtle film, and approaches its gleeful over-the-top manner with a playful zest that never lets the movie’s energy wane, but also never crosses over into that “Not only are we clever, we KNOW we’re clever” territory that often is so off-putting in the horror comedy realm.
For what the film is trying to achieve, I consider it wildly successful in reaching its goals. This is mainly due to the comedic team of Mathew Horne and James Corden, who have previously worked together as a duo on the titular BBC comedy series, Horne & Corden, but are here able to take their manic energy as Jimmy and Fletch (respectively) to the next level. The dialogue moves sharp and fast, which is as much a compliment to the writers as it is the actors, who deliver the lines with such a cheeky ease and grace, you’d never not think for a second they weren’t the hapless and lovable guys they claim to be.
Horne is especially sharp, playing Jimmy with a sense innocent befuddlement that is matched usually only by a deer caught in headlights. He presents his character very much as the average Joe, and is often far more confused by the situation than horrified, as such an outlandish circumstance would likely merit a puzzled moment or two. Jimmy is certainly not presented as the hard-ass, gun toting hero, and the audience loves him all the more because of it, as we definitely, in most cases, can relate to the feeling of being lost in a whirlwind moment.
Also notable, and likely very pleasing for sci-fi genre fans, is the bit part appearance of the 8th Doctor (that’s Doctor Who, to those not in the know) himself, Paul McGann (Queen of the Damned), as a vampire battling vicar. McGann serves here as an echo of Peter Cushing’s Van Helsing, playing the part of an aged-battler of darkness with a sour seriousness that serves as a wonderful wink to fans of old horror. McGann never lays it on too thick though, and his performance is both human and severe. He may serve as the boys’ mentor against the undead, but he doesn’t necessarily come off as the kind of teacher you’d want.
Bringing this dog and pony show together is director Phil Claydon (Championship), whose visual style is very vibrant and lush. The film often looks like a comic book or the ugly-stepsister outtakes of 300, but it adds atmosphere when necessary, and thusly, cannot be discounted as being a clever tool in making the movie a success. Problematically, Claydon often seems to rely too much on simple parlor tricks and likely could stand to do some more basic, camera-to-actor directing. If the film has any failings, it is that it often tries to look classier and sassier than it is in reality. Claydon can be forgiven his indulgences, I suppose, as he is relatively new to the world of major motion picture direction, but I’d like to see him have less flash and more panache in the future, because this is one director whose potential is still waiting to be let out of the gate.
Even with its negative aspects, Lesbian Vampire Killers is highly entertaining and gleefully laugh filled. Claydon’s film is wry, fun, and far more slapstick based than the aforementioned Shaun of the Dead, and while slapstick occasionally means the humanization of the characters may suffer a little, it served Lesbian Vampire Killers well, as it gave the film its own two undead feet to stand on, and makes it seem remarkably fresh. That is not to say the acting at all was compromised, because it certainly wasn’t. As mentioned previously, the actors are all spot on, and the cast is vibrant…you may not like the movie when all is said and done, but I defy you to not enjoy them. This was a group of people who not only made a movie, but they looked like they had a hell of a time getting it done, and when that joy comes across to the viewer, you know you’ve stumbled upon something special.
So, in summation, I’d say that Lesbian Vampire Killers isn’t perfect, but it is something wholly its own. So, when you finally get a chance to sit down and watch this film, remember to think of it as such.
…but if you don’t want to strain yourself that hard, at the very least remember this simple fact:
This film has lesbians…and vampires.
For most of you, I know that’s all you need to hear, and who am I to argue with the facts?
Order it on Amazon
Watch the trailer:
Popularity: 2% [?]
[ ‹‹ New Clips from MTV’s My Super Psycho Sweet 16! The Thaw (2009) ›› ]
2006 2007 2008 2009 awesome 80s bad movies Best of bloody book review boring brutal campy creepy disturbing Fatally Yours film festival fun ghosts gore haunted horror comedy Horror Literature humorous independent insanity interview low-budget madness monsters murders News psychological release info revenge sequel serial killer short film slasher supernatural unique vampires violent Women in Horror Worst of Zombies